You’ve just gotten engaged, and isn’t it just magical. By the third day of your engagement, people are asking you if you’ve set a date, booked a church, and when you are going dress shopping.
I never thought about my wedding as a child. I knew I wanted to be married, but there was never a fairytale scene in my mind. I didn’t have any romantic notions to base my wedding on. I had been to a few weddings, and knew what I certainly didn’t want. I felt like I was drowning in decisions and questions. As an introverted, anxiety ridden 23 year old, I couldn’t make myself what a “bride to be” is supposed to be.
There was so much pressure put on from the people surrounding me. “This will be the best day of your life!” Really, will it? Are you sure? Granted, the day I married my husband and committed my life to him was a great day. Top five, definitely. But a day centered on show-ponying myself around was never going to be the best day of my life.
In retrospect, we should have eloped. We ended up cutting our wedding down to about 40 people and a 2 person wedding party, an early morning ceremony and an afternoon reception at our house. We received a lot of criticism from my all too opinionated family, but it all turned out fine in the end.
It’s okay to not be into it. There’s an expectation that all women will love throwing themselves into wedding planning; the colors, the food, the venue, minor dress alterations, the bridesmaids’ lipstick color. If you do, that’s okay. But if you don’t that’s fine too. At the end of the day, you’re no more or less married than anyone else.